poetry
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You've been appearing in my dreams a lot lately.
Sometimes, I wonder if what you're doing is for real Or not... How are you doing today? Is everything okay? Have you Been thinking about me lately too? Has the turmoil and guilt settled down? Is your heart returning to its right place again? I have so many questions - So many I may be unable to say; So many I'll just forget to say Being in your presence. I've been slowly admitting my feelings towards you. Maybe this is why I've been so hurt; Maybe this is why it's so hard to let that night go. Will I be happy knowing nothing really won't happen? Am I happy to know that you'll at least be happy while you live your life? Where will we be in five years? Will you still be in my life? Will I have a place in your's? Heh...there we go with the questions again... That day still makes me sad. I didn't get anything out of it afterward, And I shouldn't have expected much. But, hearing you tell me what you said... It was enough to know that there was A chance. But hey, You were drunk. God, why is this always happening...? Hey. I hope you're doing well, dear. What I feel, The things I think about - They won't really go anywhere, Will they? It always goes back to me living my life. It feels as if I've been walking alone For a very long time now. I crave for this warmth, But I want it to be unnecessary. My soul will continue to chase you, And many others ahead. This end goal is bleak, While my dreams of reality shine before me. Those dreams are so close to me, So why do I keep turning around? What's so intriguing about jumping into the unknown, Knowing that there's a hell of a good chance that there will already be Nothing? I will continue to contemplate about these things As I always have; Whenever my body faces nothingness, Whenever someone like you lures my mind To drift again.
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AuthorMy name is Alexander Fang. I'm a college student studying Pharmaceutical Chemistry at University of California, Davis. This site is an amalgamation of my thoughts, dreams, and the reality I live in. It will consist of my writing, mostly. Archives
August 2020
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