Hey.
It's nice to see you again... You always return to me With that same look from back then. "Take me back." You think I will Because you're the part of me I lack. However, It doesn't take much for me to give in. You hold me, But what you've grasped is within. I thought I moved on; Pushing through like a tank. All you did was appear, and I sank. Drowning Into a pool of oblivion Silently screaming Heart turning into obsidian Why am I here again? Go away - Get out! It's only when rain settles down That you pick up the baggage And begin your leave to town. With you gone, I am free from my little shrine As it's the only moment I get to shine. This kind of love Between you and me, It's unrequited - Unordinary. I'll constantly be peering up at the sky, Anticipating a strike of lightning Within that recurring storm that follows you And drowns me.
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Death knocks on the door.
Walking off, she reminds him, "Under your mat - WEED!" I'm not attached to you
But I feel like I am It's like a vine that has plucked its thorns into me It didn't feel heavy It was lightweight But it gradually grew From my back To the rest of my body I Don't even like you I don't think I do I'm Attracted to you? I'm attracted to our intimate moments And the attention you gave me when we were in the same space Hearing your voice turns the vines into chains Turns the thorns into spears That only pierces the vicinity of my heart Hearing your name Yanks my head backwards My knees don't touch the floor And I sway in confusion Left to right As your name continues to grasp my head Slowly making its way to my chest Beginning to press the spears closer and closer Hung But still alive Why does your name clench onto me so strongly? What is this burning desire to be with you? What Is my soul calling for? I'm I don't want you as a boyfriend I I don't want I I don't know anymore Now that I've been reborn into a phoenix,
My heart-warming feathers are getting plucked again Left to right; Reviving the lives of those who rob parts of me. Once my flames decease into embers, With time, I will soar into the skies again, And I'll continue to be resurrected As it's the path I've chosen to live. But, How many more times can my flame be brought to life; How many more times Until my ashes wither to nothing? Stop conveniently taking parts of me. My soul deteriorates like ember;
Rising its ashes into the heavens. I used to think burning out like this mean it was the end. No - With time, Watch me become the phoenix That will soar into the heavens once again. I mourn
To the connections I've lost To the opportunities I could have grasped To the friends who've left me Whether it was my fault Their fault Or the fault of time and fate I mourn To the boys who I've fallen for To all the time that I have wasted And just To my older self A clueless, happier self To the parts of myself I've given away And the parts that were forcefully taken Yes
That's what it is After tonight The new fuel for my own revolution Is spite Unto this earth
We sprouted like a field of dandelions And when the wind beck's its call We'll disperse into the unknown Waiting to sprout into a community once again The red string of fate
That binds us together Submerged Finally resting Gradually rusting Images of us electrify me As our flame begins setting into dusk I'll still be grounded unto this earth While you soar to heights I may be incapable of seeing I am reminded again
That connections and people May not exist as time passes; That your time with others should not be taken for granted. I want to remember to always enjoy Being with the people who are still here, But also To thankfully let them go When it's time. |
AuthorMy name is Alexander Fang. I'm a college student studying Pharmaceutical Chemistry at University of California, Davis. This site is an amalgamation of my thoughts, dreams, and the reality I live in. It will consist of my writing, mostly. Archives
August 2020
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